Category: Satire

Sofa King, an investigation

Sofa King, an investigation

Mosaic- September 29, 2019

Senior Reporter Evan Tridone sets out to find who this elusive “sofa king” is. Tridone concludes that the “Sofa King” is a figure lost to ...

[Satire] University announces Christiana Towers as new freshman housing, set to reopen 2021

[Satire] University announces Christiana Towers as new freshman housing, set to reopen 2021

Mosaic- September 9, 2019

In what seems like an unexpected turn of events, university Residence Life & Housing (RLH) has announced the upcoming reopening of the Christiana Towers.

Satire: Superfan goes to great lengths to not spoil “Avengers: Endgame”

Satire: Superfan goes to great lengths to not spoil “Avengers: Endgame”

Column- May 6, 2019

I have taken every precaution to ensure that my first viewing of “Endgame” has complete and utter virginity. There will be no spoilers. It is ...

SATIRE: At 1,743’rd mention in 2019, Francis Alison resurrected from the dead

SATIRE: At 1,743’rd mention in 2019, Francis Alison resurrected from the dead

Mosaic- April 23, 2019

Rev. Francis Alison, the university's claimed founder, was resurrected from the dead this weekend.

SATIRE: Study shows that we should stop trusting studies

SATIRE: Study shows that we should stop trusting studies

Column- April 15, 2019

A recent poll has shown that Americans shouldn’t be so quick to believe other polls.

Satire: Family of five gets fined for having a super party

Satire: Family of five gets fined for having a super party

Mosaic- March 25, 2019

Before Jessica was even able to blow out the candles, Newark Police came bursting through the door.

Satire: Joe Biden announces he is running

Satire: Joe Biden announces he is running

Column- March 18, 2019

For the past year, former Vice President Joe Biden has been rumored to be considering a run for the 2020 presidency.

Album review: Kidz Bop 38? More like “Modern Masterpiece”

Album review: Kidz Bop 38? More like “Modern Masterpiece”

Column- December 3, 2018

I was entranced by the eerie shouts and high-pitched wails that the album featured.