Opinion: Op-Egg

Cracked egg and yolk Lorraine Cook/THE REVIEW
Amy West makes her case as to why she has never had an omelet since freshman year.

I have been out of school for five years now and there is one thing that still bothers me about my time at the university — the eggs. When I was forced to purchase a dining plan for living on campus in 2010, I figured I would try to get my money’s worth.

The first morning of school, I woke up and headed down to the Rodney Dining Hall for breakfast. I did a lap and perused my options. Hoping to get some fluffy eggs, I headed to the grill area. “Oh, omelets! Let me get some veggies,” I thought.

So, I ordered an omelet with pepper, onions and cheese. As I watched the chef pour the eggs from a water pitcher, I wasn’t so sure my choice was the best decision. (And, I’ve made some crappy decisions in my life; thinking blue curaçao and white carpets were a good mix was one of them.)

But I continued to wait for my water-pitcher eggs. I stood and watched my omelet cook as the chef folded the egg over. That was when I discovered this was not a fluffy egg omelet: this egg was like a soggy tortilla.

As it was folded over to cover my veggies, the egg started ripping around. I was appalled. I took the omelet graciously, said thank you and sat down. I was hungry, so I ate it. But as I ate, I thought, “Maybe I put too many veggies in this omelet, and that’s why it ripped.”

So, I tried again the following day. I ordered less veggies and my water-pitcher eggs were still thin and ripping apart.

The next day, I just ordered a cheese omelet, but this time, the water pitcher was empty; there were no eggs to be cooked. I asked the chef if they were out and she replied, “No, no, I just have to fill up the pitcher.”

I should not have even asked. I stood and watched as the chef turned around and took a huge white bag labeled “EGGS” and snipped the corner. She poured this eggy substance into the pitcher and walked back to the grill. I no longer wanted my cheese omelet; I no longer could bear the thought of an omelet.

From that day forward, breakfast at the Rodney Dining Hall consisted only of bread products and cereal. I have not eaten an omelet since 2011, when I watched as my omelet dripped out of a bag.

I wonder all these years later if the university still uses those bagged eggs. I hope for future generations and the sales of omelets they don’t.

Amy West is a graduate of the university. Amy can be reached at amye.west@me.com.

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