Category: Satire
Satire: Parents and Family Weekend preparedness: precautionary measures for impending catastrophe
Some university students provided their preparation plans to ensure safety before the storm strikes.
Seek, and ye shall not be found: Five places to hide when you and a couple of beers are the only witnesses to sexual assault
We at The Review have not given up hope that there are plenty of scarcely-trafficked hiding places in Delaware.
Satire: Assanis fails to realize that Delaware First festival ended three weeks ago
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js Minji Kong/THE REVIEW Assanis won't let go of "Delaware First." BY CALEB OWENS PRESIDENTIAL MANSION CORRESPONDENT Nearly three weeks after the launch of the ...
Satire: “Broke” student asks parents for money, spends it at bars
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js Creative Commons Need drinking money? Ask your parents. BY KATHERINE NAILS ASSISTANT MOSAIC EDITOR With Thanksgiving break fast approaching, students’ bank accounts are starting ...
Satire: Assanis pouts after ranking drop
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js Courtesy of Stony Brook University Assanis whines about the university’s rank dropping. BY CALEB OWENS Presidential Mansion Correspondent President Dennis Assanis has been pouting ...
Satire: Assanis reveals plans for imperial conquest
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js RANDI HOMOLA/THE REVIEW Assanis builds up his empire with his renovated Death Star. BY CALEB OWENS PRESIDENTIAL MANSION CORRESPONDENT According to President Dennis Assanis, ...
Satire: Summer renovations to presidential mansion include Biden Institute viewing balcony
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js photo by Xander Opiyo/THE REVIEW Biden fever continues this year with Assanis' new mansion renovations. BY CALEB OWENS PRESIDENTIAL MANSION CORRESPONDANT The presidential mansion ...
Satire: Senior bribes high school student for acceptance letter on Decision Day
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js Andrew Kuczmarski/THE REVIEW Decision Days have come again, and with them, a multitude of seniors who wish they could go back in time. BY ...
Biden voted Supreme Head of Universe
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js In Mosaic's latest satire, Joe Biden's recent campus visit gets a fantasy re-telling. BY ALEXANDRA KARLESSES SENIOR REPORTER Disclaimer: This is a work of ...
Satire: Student Health saves life by prescribing Gatorade
//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js Gatorade image courtesy of Gatorade; emoji courtesy of Apple Have a cold? Drink Gatorade! Stomach flu? Gatorade! Bubonic plague? Gatorade! BY CALEB OWENS SENIOR ...